Kaden's Birth Story

April 2016 May 2016

Kaden’s birth story starts mid-pregnancy as I sought input about having a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). I know some would think me crazy! Why choose to go that route when I could easily shower and look cute with a scheduled c-section?!

For me, I relate it to someone who is an average runner. One who has trained and prepared for a marathon. Then, during that first marathon, after putting 110% into it, in mile 25 a hamstring is pulled. The runner finishes it walking yet the real desire was to finish by running across the finish line. That’s me with birth! My labor and delivery with Lukas ended in a cesarean, which I was fully on-board with and glad to do after 110% of effort! I wanted to run the labor & delivery race again to see if we could get a different outcome - a different race finish if you will ;) Thus, I chose to attempt a VBAC for Kaden’s birth. We looked into the options for VBAC’s around us and by process of elimination landed on choosing a midwife at a birth center in Moscow, ID (20 minutes from us).

In mid-December, about four months pregnant, we moved in with Karl’s parents so he could begin renovations in the evenings and weekends on the downstairs unit of the Irving St duplex. where we had been living (seemed like a good idea at the time). Having help with Lukas as I got larger and more tired was every mom’s dream! I was definitely spoiled and enjoyed every minute of it.

Roughly three weeks prior to Kaden’s due date of May 14, I started having contractions about 15 minutes apart. This timing was not ideal! We were trying to get work on Irving to a point that inspections could be had and then pass the sheetrock phase on to someone else. Karl was also working on some video prep for his summer courses that, if need be, he could have someone cover his class for a day or two depending on when I went into labor.  

In order to not encourage labor, I rested as much as one can while chasing an active toddler to give Karl as much time as possible to work before baby arrived! The contractions would ease up during the night and mornings and then begin in the late afternoons and evenings. They weren’t consistent but did begin to become stronger and longer. Thankfully, Kaden chose to wait and we were able to get to the week of his due date, which was also the start of summer classes for Karl.

I began to be more active that week. His due date of Thursday, May 14 came and went. Friday evening, Karl’s sister, Kari and his two aunts, Nadine and Lauren, surprised us with a visit! They were hoping for a baby to snuggle but Kaden had his own timing in store. On Saturday, Karl worked on the Irving house renovation with Kari’s, Nadine’s, & Lauren’s help. It was a quick visit as we waved them off that afternoon after the renovation work so they could be back for things on Sunday. 

(Picture: Aunt Lauren hanging out Friday, two days before Kaden arrived! Lukas at 19 months! Me at very pregnant.)

Sunday morning, May 17, around 4:00 a.m. Kaden began making it known that he was now ready! I lay in bed realizing contraction pain was increasing and timing between was becoming shorter. I woke Karl up around 4:30 to alert him. We were excited...and excited we’d made it this far! I sent Nicole, our doula, a text around 5:15 a.m. asking how her other client was doing since I knew she was at another birth - same thing happened with Lukas’ labor - ha! She replied that the baby had arrived a few hours earlier and a little more sleep would be nice but she’d be ready whenever we wanted her. Love her!! I lasted about 23 minutes to be exact. I sent her another text that I’d like her with us. Only an hour after my first alert to her, she was present and ready to support us in all things laboring!! Karl let his parents know we were in labor downstairs and they would be officially on Lukas duty when he woke up.

The next several hours Nicole had me in various positions to help Kaden continue to drop and be in good position. I also continued to wait for the pain to increase. It never did. Don’t get me wrong. There was definitely labor pains! But with Lukas’ birth I was induced with pitocin to get my contractions going. When I had sought understanding for a VBAC, the gal I met with told me to think of the pain with a pitocin-induced labor at a “10” on a scale. Then, drop that pain down a couple notches to an “8” for a labor that begins naturally. It was totally true! I was even more proud of myself going el-natural (no pain meds/epidural) with Lukas’ labor on pitocin! Around 12:30 p.m., Nicole suggested a shower to help ease the aches, I went into the bathroom and basically turned around. The thought of getting in and out and knowing we still had drive somewhere, was not appealing. She suggested it was probably a good time to head to Moscow and the birth center to our mid-wife.

(Picture: The only one we took laboring at home. Early labor stage with that goofy look :) Truth be told, I was bummed we didn’t take more at home to capture all we did!)

In preparation for the drive, Nicole tied a rebozo (think long fabric) underneath my tummy and around my hips to support and apply pressure for the contractions as we drove to the birth center (20 minutes away). Nicole drove her car and Karl (obviously!) drove us. I was kneeling on the front floorboards of the passenger side with my head laying on the seat and my hands grabbing the seat back. It was probably the most intense pain as we were driving and I didn’t have Karl and Nicole’s support around my hips. We made it though! And so did my midwife Nancy. She had been on a call an hour and half away at another birth, had just gotten home to take a shower and get sleep when Nicole called letting her know we were in transit :D Ahhh, the life of babies for midwives and doulas! Always making things exciting and sleepless.

Once we arrived at the birth center and settled in, Nancy told me that normally she doesn’t check right away but because there was another possible baby on its way as well, she needed to make a plan depending on how far along I was. (Side note: Nancy delivered four babies within 24 hours. Kaden was number three!) I agreed to the check of course and prepared myself to be 3 to 4 cm. As she was feeling me, she paused and got a funny look on her face. Then she said, “Kristy, I think you’re 9 cm!” She double-checked and sure enough, I was 9 cm. I was ecstatic! Those hours laboring at home, along with the positions Nicole had me in, my body had done its job!

Back pressure from Nicole, Emotional support from Karl

During the next two hours of laboring, Karl and I got in the birthing tub which was one of my favorite parts during those two hours. Having Karl apply hip pressure during contractions in a big tub of water could almost be called relaxing. Almost. After a while though, I was antsy and didn’t want to be in the tub any longer. Around 4 p.m., we chose to have Nancy break my waters in hopes that it put me into pushing mode. It did the trick! Pushing Kaden was different than with Lukas, which makes sense because that’s where Lukas stopped descending after the first hour of pushing with him. Just for my memory alone, labor had felt like “nothing” up to this point compared to Lukas’ - that’s what surprised me the most.  That is, until the pushing.

What I remember most about pushing with Kaden is that I felt most comfortable on the birthing stool leaning against Karl (who was back to back with Nicole for support) and having my legs propped up on Nancy’s shoulders as she sat in front of me so I had something to push against. We also all joked with Karl that he needed to use his engineering to figure out some sort of gadget that connects to the birthing stool to help the leg pushing support and make us all lots of money. The things you do while pushing a baby out….

Left: The best support team a girl could ask for.

Right: Nancy (on the right), our fantastic midwife, with Nicole and Kaden at 2.5 months

Nancy continued to check Kaden’s heart rate as I continued the pushing process. About an hour and half into pushing, they were seeing his head, but she was also watching his heart rate drop. At that point, instead of her slow and steady pushing approach, she told me we needed to get him out. And to PUSH on the next few contractions. PUSH, I did.

With ALL I had, I pushed Kaden into the world. Yes, pain. Yes, glory. Yes, amazing. I get choked up just thinking about it. Nancy placed him on my chest and I couldn’t believe that we had just accomplished a VBAC. It was an amazing moment. I will say here that I’ve heard pushing your baby out naturally creates some sort of amazing high yet I can’t say that I experienced that sensation. I was glad I had chosen the VBAC route and I knew I had “finished my marathon” but there definitely was not a euphoric high for me. Just sayin’. Maybe that will help someone else know it’s okay if they don’t get that sensation either.

Seconds after birth - Real life.

Seconds after birth - Smile!

I had my first moments with Kaden and Karl was proud daddy once again! He was born at 5:38 p.m. and was 6 lbs., 8 oz. and 20 inches long. Karl was also able to clamp Kaden’s umbilical cord. As Nancy began her afterbirth exam, she unfortunately found that because of the intense pushing I had to do to get Kaden out, I had a fourth degree tear. Yup. Go big or go home. For those that don’t know, that’s the “best” you can do. A one degree tear is blip on the radar compared to a fourth. Nancy can stitch up a first or second degree tear but with a third or fourth degree, it’s best to have a surgeon sew you up. Soooo, no idyllic sweet moments for us at the birth center with Kaden after he was born. That is definitely my only “sad” part of Kaden’s birth experience. Obviously, it was important to get me to the hospital to begin the stitching process yet it caused a flurry of timing that didn’t leave much to take in the moments. Nancy cleaned me up. Her assistants (I think! Or maybe, Nicole?!) cleaned up and clothed Kaden. And 30 minutes after birth, Karl was putting Kaden into his carseat for his first car ride :) Hahaha. Still cracks me up for some reason and I’ll never forget how cute he looked ready for his first ride!

“Ready for the carseat, dad!”

I was a bit light headed after the blood loss, not much food, all the effort of labor...you know, my marathon! Karl picked me up and put me in the car and drove us to the hospital. A great feature of our birth center is that it’s only three blocks from the hospital. Nancy and Nicole both drove their separate vehicles. I was checked in and longer story short, sewed up by Dr. Trihn (she was great!). Karl will tell you I hummed my entire way through that sewing job. I did. It’s how I coped with the pain and mental thought of it all. (Sidenote: A cup of warmed up prune juice with two tablespoons melted butter in it works like a charm to help the system move freely! I didn’t think the taste was too bad. I may or may not have called it my “hot toddy.”)

At Gritman Medical Center ready to be sewn up.

We stayed overnight so they could monitor me. Lukas was able to visit the next morning with Momo and Bobo (Karl’s parents). We were discharged that afternoon. I laid low for three weeks resting and recovering. It’s one of the best things a new mama can do after birth, I believe! I set up help with friends during the day for Lukas so that Karl’s mom wasn’t doing it all herself.

Meeting older brother Lukas for the first time!

Our friends Vince & Randi McIntryre were also visiting

when Momo brought Lukas in to see us.

The name Kaden means “companion” and we pray he will be a great companion who reflects God’s friendship towards us.  Using “Karl” as his middle name is tradition on Karl’s side to use the father’s name as the middle name for the second son, if there is one.

We love you, Kaden Karl! Happy 1st Birthday! We are blessed and humbled to be your parents and looking forward to how God shapes and uses you.